I haven’t written more on my story since…. Tuesday? Did I write on Wednesday? I think I did. Nothing yesterday and most decidedly nothing tonight. Ok, not most decidedly. There’s a chance I’ll write something tonight. But it’s a slim one. Slim like a ruler… when you have it sideways. Slim like a piece of paper. Slim like a thread. Slim like a … um.. slim thing.
I doubt you’re wondering why my word count has stalled. I’m going to tell you anyway. There are a few reasons, and here they are (have you guys noticed that I’m loving the lists nowadays? I really am. Lists make me feel happy.)
1. The First Week is Over
I have a commitment problem. I am only committed to things for a percentage of it’s duration. And by things I mean projects. At least, personal projects. Do you remember that Photo Album project I mention earlier in my blog? (last year, I think). I suppose only people who have been reading for a long time will remember that, which is why I made that link there. Click it. Read it. It’s informative. It might even be entertaining, but I’m not quite sure because I don’t remember how I wrote the information, just that I did. I could reread it now to provide a better break down of it’s entertaining-ness factor, but I’m lazy.
So, that project hasn’t really gone anywhere since I wrote that blog. I THINK I managed to complete one more album, but if I recall correctly, the photos all came out funky colours (photo printers are awesome, but can be problematic at times)… so I didn’t continue. Maybe over the Christmas holidays. Maybe. Probably not.
Anyway, so my commitment to a personal project goes something like this:
- First 1/4 of the time it takes to complete a project – YEAH! WOO! PRODUCTIVITY! I LOOOOOOOVE DOING THIS! HELLO YOU’RE AWESOME! AND I’M AWESOME! LET’S BE AWESOME TOGETHER PROJECT! LET’S! WOOOO!!
- Second 1/4 of the time – I should really work on that project. I did want to complete it. It’ll be awesome when it’s done, because then I don’t have to think about it any more. Buuuut, I worked really hard and it’ll be ok if I don’t do it today. I’ll work on it tomorrow… yeah. Tomorrow. Tonight I’ll just relax. Yeeeaaah. I like my couch. Ooh, TV!
- Third 1/4 of the time – *works on project for five minutes* phew! That’s done. Time to go *insert random task/activity here*
- Last 1/4 of the time – Friend: Hey! How’s your project coming? Me: My what? I don’t know what you’re talking about *scuttles away in shame*
In the case of NaNoWriMo… well, the first week is over. There are four weeks. I am now on the second quarter. My “plan” is to write 5K tomorrow. I’ll let you know how THAT goes.
I mean… I have total faith in myself.
(Just to clarify, the above schedule of my dedication to projects only applies to ones of a personal nature. Ones I’m doing for myself. If I’m doing a job, where I’m in an office or for a freelance project, I’m the complete opposite. Complete. Opposite.)
2. My MC is a Crazy Biatch
The plot of my story is sort of contingent on the reader believing that my character is ok and sane and normal. Basically, I need the reader to empathize with my MC (her name’s Clara. I’m just going to say Clara from now on) and believe that her family is withholding something from her. Right now, Clara comes off as a crazy biatch. Seriously. You read it and you think – whoa, she’s disturbed. Someone get her some help, stat! Which means you’re not believing her… which means that my plot twist really isn’t going to work.
I tried to write through it, to make her more believable.
That didn’t work.
Now I’m hoping that if I just stay away for a day or two the solution will pop into my brain randomly in the middle of the night.
It hasn’t. Not yet anyway. But with my track record, it never will…. (see point 1)
3. I’m “Busy” & Lazy
Here is what I hope will be an amusing debate I had with myself today…
- I’m busy… I play soccer twice a week now (my second league started on Tuesday). That’s an excuse because last Thursday, I wrote almost 2,000 words…. so I met the daily minimum to complete the 50K by the 30th…
- My place is an absolute pig sty and I have to do laundry Hahahahaha, because I’m cleaning and doing laundry right now? Bahahahahahaha.
- My boyfriend is feeling neglected. If he is, he’s not pushing to hang out… because he supports me and wants me to succeed. And he’s awesome.
- My brain aches from working too hard today and I need a break from the computer. Nu uh you lazy person you. What am I doing right now? Huh? What? I’m typing a blog…. And what am I typing it on?? Hmmmm?? The… the… *hangs head and whispers* computer.. I win.
4. That debate crushed my spirits
It didn’t really, but I felt over dramatizing this would get better results. In reality, even though I KNOW I should be writing for NaNoWriMo, I’m also still… uh… 1,000 words ahead of where I should be today (Day 9) and thus I feel it’s ok to slack off.
There’s nothing worse than telling yourself it’s ok to slack off people.
And yet I have. I am. I’m currently telling myself it’s ok. So I’m going to sign off, proudly proclaiming my hypocrisy and spend the evening doing something that may or may not be writing. Though I’ll probably end up writing sometime later tonight. After all, I have commitment problems (see point 1).
Anyone else finding that, now that the first push of NaNoWriMo is over, they’re having troubles keeping their momentum? Or am I the only one??